Lynne In The Kitchen

Muninn

Muninn

Silver Member
Some of you may remember that Lynne tried her hand as an actress, and featured in a short story. Well, now she's trying her hand at television presenting and wanted to show off her, erm, skills. She was going to try for a DIY programme, but we all remember what happened when it got round to her doing the painting! :whistle: So given that it is too crap outside to do any gardening, Lynne decided on a reboot of the old cookery programme "Farmhouse Kitchen" - sadly the budget was even lower than the one for her film, and so there's no farmhouse... but at least there's a kitchen!

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TV Announcer: "And now we cross over to the Farmhouse Kitchen where Lynne has a few delicious surprises are in store...."


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(Cue some appropriate jazzy theme music, look it up on YouTube if you can't remember!)


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"Well hello everyone, and welcome to Lynne's Kitchen. Today we're going to make a simple autumnal dish using fruit from the garden":


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"We shall make a apple and blackcurrant crumble using some fresh apples and some berries that we stored in the freezer from this summer":


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"Now I hate getting my clothes dirty, so my dear M has bought me a new apron to wear. So, I'll get ready, tie my hair back, wash my hands, and we'll be back after the break!":

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Part 2:


"Welcome back, and now we shall start to prepare... what do you mean, Where are my clothes?? Like I said, I don't like getting my clothes dirty!"


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"Now, where were we? Ah yes - first we need to slice up the apples. Peel them first if you want to. I reckon three of these apples will do":


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"Put the sliced up apples into an oven dish, then put the blackcurrants on top":


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"Now for the topping. We need 100g of flour - we're using a mixture of plain flour and rye flour. Add 50g of brown sugar too.":


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"Hang on, we've forgotten something important, it's in the fridge!":


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"I can't believe it... it's not butter! Well, it'll have to do..."


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"So, we put a big scoop of whatever this is into the bowl, about 25-30g - just enough to make things nice and moist":


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"Now we'll get right in there with our hands and mix things up. Ooh, it's sticky!"


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"Once done, put the crumble mixture on top of the fruit, making sure it is all covered up. I like to put a good dusting of cinnamon on top too.":


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"Cover the dish with tin foil, and put it into a warmed oven. We broke the big oven (don't even ask how!) so this one will have to do. Set the temperature at 200 degrees... because let's face it, that's what everything cooks at in this kitchen... and leave it in for 20-30 minutes until the crumble is golden brown. If it is black or on fire, you've cooked it too long!":


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"It's around about now that your significant other will come into the kitchen and ask if there's anything they can do. Well, put them to good use and tell them to make a brew and wash the pots. Meanwhile, put your feet up! I'll chill out and get this lot down me. See you in part three!

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Part 3:

"Ah, welcome back! (Hic!) Sounds like the oven has just pinged, so let's go have a look! (burrrp!)"


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"Excellent, the lovely M has just pulled the crumble out of the oven. Now, there's one more thing I need to get from the fridge!":


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"You can serve it with fresh cream or even custard, but we've decided to go for good old squirty cream, because we're classy like that!"


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"And there we are, all ready to eat!":


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"Oh no, the squirty cream is out of control... oh dear, this isn't good... help!":


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"That's all we've got time for this episode. M is going to lick... I mean clean the cream off me, and we're going to enjoy our crumble. See you all next time, if we haven't been cancelled that is!".
 
Well all I can say is its a darned good job Miss Lynne did take those precautions to keep her clothes clean, else she'd have squirty cream all over her nice jumper... :whistle::whistle:

:twisted::twisted:

K
 
All the time Lynne is rummaging around in the fridge you won't be short of somewhere to park your bicycle Muninn :D

Great shoot Sir and the crumble looks proper tasty :tu
 
I don't know what the cause is, I really don't....is it words like, moist, sticky and squirty? Is it nips covered in cream? is it a lovely peachy bum? Is it a home-baked crumble? Or a combination of all those things, either way I am drooling!!!(I blame Lynne:cool:)


It's great seeing Lynne gaining fame with the show (my mind did jump to the galloping gourmet at first:rolleyes:) and she is correct, men often offer to help when all is done...well at least we offer, isn't 'better late than never' an actual phrase?:D
 
It's a product we have in the UK that is similar to butter called, 'I can't believe it's not butter' due to the similarity to butter:)
 
Absolutely brilliant, Muninn :b Lynne has found her vocation in life. I loved her cooking show and can't wait for the next episode.

I loved this line: "Set the temperature at 200 degrees... because let's face it, that's what everything cooks at in this kitchen... and leave it in for 20-30 minutes until the crumble is golden brown. If it is black or on fire, you've cooked it too long!"

:24:24
 
Great show for us to see, couple of nice firm peaches showing. As a Chef not everything is cooked at 200! Crumble veing one of my favs as nearly always cooked one in fridge as I batch cook apple and blackberries from 2021. As I used to cook most times I never got to sit down I had to my own washing up!! I didn't know you could still get that butter type as I use Stork or Flora and it's a great combination to use different flours and sugars. Well done, I haven't taught mine to cook yet.
 
great pics lynne, we usually add some oatmeal to the crumble mix and use melted butter or equal substitute.

carlys_guy
 
Lynne looking in the fridge should be your entry in this months competition.

Congrats on good story and excellent film production. (gnashes his teeth in envy)
 
Nice one Lynne. :tu

Was gonna ask if it should be served hot, but quickly realised it's a stoopid bloody question.

🤤
 
jock001 said:
Lynne looking in the fridge should be your entry in this months competition.
Click to expand...
Ah, I wish I had seen that before! I've actually been sitting on this set since before Christmas as I wasn't quite happy with a few shots. The kitchen isn't the largest of spaces and so getting the right shot wasn't easy. Also the lighting is a bit shit in there, and a lightbox just wasn't going to fit in there! Still, I reckon I buggered about with the post-process enough to get away with it :D
 
Avonman1 said:
Great show for us to see, couple of nice firm peaches showing. As a Chef not everything is cooked at 200! Crumble veing one of my favs as nearly always cooked one in fridge as I batch cook apple and blackberries from 2021. As I used to cook most times I never got to sit down I had to my own washing up!! I didn't know you could still get that butter type as I use Stork or Flora and it's a great combination to use different flours and sugars. Well done, I haven't taught mine to cook yet.
Click to expand...

Lulu1971 said:
Absolutely brilliant, Muninn :b Lynne has found her vocation in life. I loved her cooking show and can't wait for the next episode.

I loved this line: "Set the temperature at 200 degrees... because let's face it, that's what everything cooks at in this kitchen... and leave it in for 20-30 minutes until the crumble is golden brown. If it is black or on fire, you've cooked it too long!"

:24:24
Click to expand...

Sometimes we go for a temperature other than 200 :D Mercifully our cooking skills have advanced beyond the "Oh, the smoke alarm's going off, dinner's ready!"

The "I can't believe it's not butter" stuff was what was the most reasonably priced in the local shop - I'll often use Flora, or even one of the olive oil based ones if I'm feeling flush.

I reckon there may be a second episode in the planning, I have some ideas...
 
Karrot said:
Well all I can say is its a darned good job Miss Lynne did take those precautions to keep her clothes clean, else she'd have squirty cream all over her nice jumper... :whistle::whistle:

:twisted::twisted:

K
Click to expand...

revoL annaerB said:
I don't know what the cause is, I really don't....is it words like, moist, sticky and squirty? Is it nips covered in cream? is it a lovely peachy bum? Is it a home-baked crumble? Or a combination of all those things, either way I am drooling!!!(I blame Lynne:cool:)

It's great seeing Lynne gaining fame with the show (my mind did jump to the galloping gourmet at first:rolleyes:) and she is correct, men often offer to help when all is done...well at least we offer, isn't 'better late than never' an actual phrase?:D
Click to expand...

Lynne is of the opinion that she can make a better Nigella Lawson than Nigella herself - let's face it, we never see her cooking naked! Good thing I bought her the apron or else it'd end up like her painting efforts...




hollows+fentiman said:
:21:24

Yeah, just what I was thinking!

Great stuff Muninn! I bet cleaning up afterwards was fun too!:whistle:


Cheers, Hollows.
Click to expand...

Yes, it certainly was... :whistle:
 
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