Part 2:
"Welcome back, and now we shall start to prepare... what do you mean, Where are my clothes?? Like I said, I don't like getting my clothes dirty!"
"Now, where were we? Ah yes - first we need to slice up the apples. Peel them first if you want to. I reckon three of these apples will do":
"Put the sliced up apples into an oven dish, then put the blackcurrants on top":
"Now for the topping. We need 100g of flour - we're using a mixture of plain flour and rye flour. Add 50g of brown sugar too.":
"Hang on, we've forgotten something important, it's in the fridge!":
"I can't believe it... it's not butter! Well, it'll have to do..."
"So, we put a big scoop of whatever this is into the bowl, about 25-30g - just enough to make things nice and moist":
"Now we'll get right in there with our hands and mix things up. Ooh, it's sticky!"
"Once done, put the crumble mixture on top of the fruit, making sure it is all covered up. I like to put a good dusting of cinnamon on top too.":
"Cover the dish with tin foil, and put it into a warmed oven. We broke the big oven (don't even ask how!) so this one will have to do. Set the temperature at 200 degrees... because let's face it, that's what everything cooks at in this kitchen... and leave it in for 20-30 minutes until the crumble is golden brown. If it is black or on fire, you've cooked it too long!":
"It's around about now that your significant other will come into the kitchen and ask if there's anything they can do. Well, put them to good use and tell them to make a brew and wash the pots. Meanwhile, put your feet up! I'll chill out and get this lot down me. See you in part three!